THE SYSTEM THAT LETS WOMEN DIE QUIETLY You learn pretty young, as a girl in this world, that a woman’s suffering has to look a certain way before anyone cares. If you scream — you’re dramatic. If you cry — you’re manipulative. If you stay quiet — you must not be hurting enough. If you explain calmly — you’re lying. If you fall apart — you’re unstable. If you stay strong — you must be fine. There is no version of female pain that the system respects. And mine was no exception.